Fisherman jokes
Fishermen are the best at networking.
What do you call an expert fisherman?
A "MASTER-BAITER".
What do a fisherman and a prostitute have in common?
They're both hookers.
Guy 1: "Tell me a bad pun."
Guy 2: "Alright. What's the difference between a tuna fish, a piano, and a tube of glue?"
Guy 1: "Ok, that last one was random as heck. What is the difference?"
Guy 2: "You can tuna a piano, but you can't piano a tuna."
Guy 1: "Ok, where does the glue come in?"
Guy 2: "Ah, I knew you'd get stuck on that."
A sailor drops anchor in a port and heads into the nearest pub. Everyone in the pub is whispering and pointing at him because of his odd-shaped body; he has a very muscular body, but a very tiny head on his shoulders.
As he orders his drink, he tells the bartender, "I'll explain. I get this in every port and town I visit. I caught a mermaid and she granted me three wishes if I would release her back into the sea. So I told her I wanted a yacht and, sure enough, she came through for me. Next, I asked for a million bucks and now I am set for life. Last of all, I asked her if I could have sex with her and her response was, 'I don't know how you can make love to me with your type of body.' So I asked her, 'How about a little head?'"
Did you hear about the cannibal who converted to Catholicism?
On Fridays, he only eats fishermen!
What's the difference between a golfer and a fisherman? A fisherman has to bring proof back.
How do you say "fish" without the "i"?
Fsh
Why did the shark fisherman stop at the abortion clinic?
Because dead babies make the best chum! :)
If a master fisherman had a caddie, what would be the caddie's job title?
A master baiter.
What do you call a rapper who LOVES fishing?
MC Bass-Drop.
Why did the rapper become a fisherman?
Because they loved dropping BASS.
Why did the rapper become a fisherman?
Because he wanted to reel in the BEST HOOKS.
My grandfather is a great fisherman, especially at baiting a rod.
I guess you could call him the Master Baiter.
Why did the rapper become a fisherman?
Because he wanted to drop some DEEP SEA RHYMES.
Why do rappers make great fishermen?
They always have the best HOOKS.
Fishing and girlfriends are exactly alike. There may be plenty of fish in the sea, but until I find one, I'm stuck here holding my rod.
My wife caught me one day for watching a porn channel, so I quickly turned the TV to a fishing channel. On her way out, she said: "You should stay on the porn channel. You know how to fish!"
I have a fish that can breakdance only for 20 seconds, and he can only do it once.
My fish can break dance. Only for 20 seconds and only once.
My neighbor has been mad at his wife for sunbathing nude. I personally am on the fence.