War jokes
I'm going to bomb a little child (I'm an USA bomber).
What's the difference between an Al Qaeda Base and a Pakistani School?
"I don't know man, I just fly the drones."
What do you call a person who died in war?
Little Johnny.
Hitler is amazing; he's dead but still alive because he did Nazi death coming. It never happened.
My grandad killed Hitler. He was such a great man!
What has 15 arms, 9 legs, 8 heads, and 12 eyeballs?
A mosque after a missile strike.
During the Great War, a man holding a machine gun shoots down a swarm of soldiers running on a swamp.
He says: "You came to the wrong swamp, Americans! You came to the wrong swamp!" *He didn't stop firing.*
Why is the USA so bad at chess?
Because they already lost the Twin Towers.
What is Osama Bin Laden's favorite song rn??
UNDAAAA THE SEAAAA - by the little mermaid.
Why did the towers fall? Because someone in Call of Duty hijacked the planes and crashed them into it.
Suicide bombers, carry bombs and remember to breathe.
Why don't you see any more fat Chinese men?
Because the last Chinese man was in WW2.
What's Osama bin Laden's favorite song?
"Under the Sea!" (The Little Mermaid)
Why do orphans not play Call of Duty?
Because they have to land at houses.
Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm stuck on the Eston Front, And so are f***ing you.
Who will win the war: like for Russia, dislike for Ukraine?
I declare war on Gwen!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Gun. Gun who?
I'm just gonna say it, and don't get offended, but I'm so sick of the media being on the female side. It never shows what life is like for a male.
Yes, women do have it hard in life because they have to give birth, etc.
But men have it pretty hard too, if not harder. Males are criticized for showing emotions.
Men have to go to war on the front lines.
Boys have less support from their friends because showing any emotion is a sign of weakness.
Boys have to wear trousers in schools where they practically burn to death in summer, meanwhile girls get to wear dresses and skirts. And now we hear girls complaining about them not being allowed to wear trousers. Yet we haven't ever heard anything about boys protesting about wearing shorts to school. It's because no one will take a man's protest seriously because the media is always against the men.
Man-rape is unheard of in the media, and I've never seen anything in any form of news accusing a woman as a rapist.
We are expected to gather up our guts [and] ask a girl to be their girlfriend. We have to take them on dates, pay the bill, [and] buy them gifts when the girls never do anything like that for us males. We have to get a job while they put on makeup and go out with their friends and spend 3 months' worth of the money the man has made.
And the women say we only rape women and that we restrict women from doing certain things like fighting in world wars.
It's because most males do not want females to get hurt, yet we are criticized for this.
I propose an idea that on the 19th of September every year (until we get the point across) all males do not go to work, etc.
Who's going to put out all the fires? The two "firewomen" at the local fire station? Who is going to work in the major corporations? The secretary's and the receptionist?
Women are always saying that the world will be a better place if they're are no men around. Let's show them how wrong they are.
(This event can be done worldwide.)
Share this with as many people who still believe in the rights of the males.
(I'm not against feminism; it's just that everything in the media is about some stupid problem women are complaining about + hatred for males everywhere.
But I think that nowadays women have more rights than men because they can wear what they want, do what they want, and never get criticized or face any consequences.)
"Pootin is a pussy won't even fight in the war that he started!"
"Pootin is a pussy and Ukraine is beating Russia's ass!"