War jokes
My dad died in 9/11. I'll always remember his last words:
Allah hu akbar.
My uncle died on 9/11. Her last words were "Allahu Akbar."
What is a fun game for an emo kid?
Tug-o-war with a tree.
Ukraine be like dead children...
RUSSIA BE LIKE DEAD GENERALS!
Why does the military pick orphans as fighter pilots?
Because homing missiles don't work on them.
Memes
People are fighting in a war, and a man gets hit four times in the arm and says, "'Tis but a scratch!"
And the other guy, looking at him in shock, says, "A scratch? Your arm is off your body!"
*World War 2 going on and then stops.*
Me: "I guess you would say it was a gory-ious battle."
Random guy: Come on, Bin Laden, time is ticking. Get it, ticking. OK, I'll leave.
Steps to win a Nerf war:
Step 1. Take out Nerf bullets.
Step 2. Load hollow points.
Step 3. Win!
Wonder why the Japanese people didn't see the bombs coming?
They didn't open their eyes.
Iran: Prepare the FINAL SOLUTION.
Israel: And you'll be telling the whole world, "I-RAN AWAY!"
How would negotiations between Putin and Zelensky play out?
QUEUE THE MUSIC
BANG BANG INTO THE ROOM I KNOW U WANT IT
You know the saying, "Third time's the charm?"
Well, Germany lost twice.
What's Bin Laden's favorite flavor of crisp? Plain.
Why can’t Hitler join the track? Because he can’t even finish a race.
Osama Bin Laden thrown in ocean!
People who helped with the Twin Towers destruction: ...
"You cannot win a war without a war."
-Sun Tzu, *The Art Of War*
Osama bin Laden
Got like 2,997 kills, damn, that's a new record!
Stalin asked Hitler if he wants to hear a joke.
Hitler says, “Yes.”
Stalin then says, “Moscow.” Hitler replies with “I don’t get it?”
Stalin laughs for a long time and says, “And you never will.”
What is Osama bin Laden's favorite game?
Hide and seek.