Vs jokes
I can make a living with the "Treat Yo self" budget.
Yet I can’t use the "Help yo self" budget.
What's the difference between my dad and cancer? Cancer doesn't leave you.
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apple gets picked.
What’s the difference between a computer and Paul Walker? I give a crap when my computer crashes.
What's the difference between an orphan and cotton?
One gets picked.
What's the difference between a dead person and a walkie-talkie?
A dead person does not walkie or talkie.
"I'm sorry" and "I apologize" mean the same thing. Except at a funeral.
What's the difference between an orphan and an apple?
An apple gets picked.
What is the difference between a bag of chips and a gun?
If you pull one of them suddenly, everybody wants to be your friend.
There's a difference between my brother and Stephen Hawking.
At least Stephen Hawking does something.
When they said Titanic was "unsinkable," then they said, "The World Trade Centers was uncollapsible."
What's the difference between a flower and an orphan?
One is allowed in the house.
What's the difference between oral sex and anal sex?
Oral sex will make your whole day. Anal sex will make your hole weak.
Why is America better than Japan at rapping?
Because we're better at dropping bombs.
What's the difference between sex and rape? Some effective drugs.
On Paxomedy channel, I made a video of a Rooster and a dog fighting.
I needed to know why they were fighting. Once I dug down into the issue, it turned out that the Dog called the Rooster a Cock, and the Rooster laughed and called the Dog a useless Bitch, and that was the beginning of their fight, and weird enough, the Cock won!
I went to congratulate the winner, but he thought he was insulting me by calling me Zinjathropus, but I said that was a compliment because Zinja was an old skeleton found in Africa, and I am African. I said to the Rooster he shouldn't have fought with the dog just because he called him a Cock. He said that being called a Cock is a compliment, and the fighting was his exercise to toughen up for serious fights with Dogs!
What’s the difference between a thief and a pervert?
One will snatch your watch, the other will watch your snatch.
What's similar between McDonald's and priests?
They both stick their meat in 10-year-old buns.
What’s the difference between a tire and three-hundred-sixty-five used condoms?
One’s a good year; the other’s a great year!
Q: What's the difference between LeBron James and a priest?
A: The size of balls they play with.