Vs jokes
What's the similarity between your mum and West Ham?
Your mum blows spunk bubbles from her ass.
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apple gets picked.
A handicapped person and an orphan get into a fight. The orphan says, "At least I have two functional legs." The handicapped person says, "At least I have two functional parents."
What is the difference between an orphan and an apple?
Apples get picked.
I love almond milk. It’s unlike any udder milk.
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?
Apples get picked.
What’s the difference between a suicide bomber and a feminist? A suicide bomber actually does something when triggered.
What's the difference between a bad joke and an actually bad joke?
An actually bad joke is not funny, like this one!
What's the difference between family and cats...
Cats won't abuse you at Christmas.
What’s the difference between me and grass? Grass doesn’t cut itself.
What's the difference between orphans and dogs?
Dogs get adopted.
A computer is a HARDware device. How come someone still feels it is MicroSOFT?
What's the difference between a school shooting pistol and a baked potato? The physical composition, of course, but they both pack the same heat.
What's the difference between Isaac Newton and the baby I just stabbed?
Isaac Newton died a virgin.
What does a school bus crash and a train crash have in common?
They always line up.
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan? Only the apple got picked up.
What's the difference between a golfer and a fisherman? A fisherman has to bring proof back.
What is the difference between an orphan and a snake?
A snake has a home to go to underground.
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?
An apple can trace back its family tree.
What's the difference between an orphanage and a supermarket?
People actually want stuff in a supermarket.