Violence jokes
I say, punch an orphan. What are they going to do, tell their parents?
What do you call a person with 2 black eyes?
Nothing, you told them twice.
Why is it okay to hit an orphan?
It’s not like they can tell their parents.
I kicked a ball at the kid in the wheelchair, and now we're playing Rocket League.
How do you make a cat sound like a dog? Pour gasoline on it, then light it on fire and it will go "WOOF!"
How do you make a dog sound like a cat? Put it in the deep freeze until frozen solid, then run it through an electric saw and it will go "MMMRROWWWWWW!"
What did the orphan do when he got punched?
Nothing, because his parents weren't there! :)
How do you circumcise a hillbilly?
Kick his sister in the jaw.
I pushed a disabled kid into a fire and called him "hot wheels."
A black guy walks into a store to buy some watermelon and fried chicken. The cashier says, "That'll be $20." He pulls out his wallet, but it's empty. Suddenly, a bigger black guy bursts in, grabs him, and says, "Time to pay up, n***a!" Then he bends him over the counter and fucks him in the ass.
What is 1 + 1?
They didn’t tell me. Their stomach is upset.
What’s the difference between the baby I just stabbed and Isaac Newton?
Isaac Newton died a virgin.
Teacher: What comes after C?
Me: Ooh! Ooh! C4!
Teacher: Umm, ok... but still what comes after A?
Me: AK47!!!
Teacher thought: Oh hell na.
Teacher: What comes after X?
Me: Xplosin.
1 second later, bomb goes off. Idk.
I am armed with an automatic 4-OXD 22. caliber machine gun. HANDS IN THE AIR!
What's worse than a dead baby?
A pile of dead babies.
What's worse than that?
One's alive at the bottom.
What's even worse than THAT?
It eats it's way out.
Wait it gets worse...
It goes back for seconds.
Just one more I swear...
It fucks one of it's siblings at the bottom.
What do you get when you beat up an autistic kid?
Mashed potatoes.
What does the school shooter do after he shoots a victim? He shoots more kids in them!
How do you fit a hundred babies into a small bucket?
With a blender.
You walk into a room, and there’s a lot of people waiting in line to punch you... Yeah, that’s the punchline.
What falls from the tree first, the autistic retard or the apple?
The apple, because the rope caught the autistic retard.
Why the hell would I go to a shooting range when I could go to school and do it for free?