A teacher gives her kindergarten students four flavors of lifesavers, and they have to guess the flavors. The students guess cherry, lime, and orange. They don't know the last flavor. So, the teacher gives them a hint and says, "It's what your parents call each other." [honey] But a little girl shouts and says, "OMG, they're assholes."
People are like potatoes.
We may look different, but we all taste the same with a little ketchup.
A couple were trying new things in the bedroom to spice up their marriage. The husband would blindfold the wife, put on a condom and she would guess the flavor. They did this one time a night.
The first night, she put the blindfold on and he put the condom on his dick and she tasted it, she immediately knew it was strawberry. The second night, the same thing happened except it was banana. The third night, she put the blindfold on and tasted his dick and said, "Eww it tastes like cheese and onions." The husband replied, "Hang on I haven't put the condom on yet."
A teacher is doing an experiment about taste. She tells each student to line up so she can give them each a lifesaver, so they can tell her what flavor it is. She gives Suzy a pineapple one. Suzy tries it, says the flavor, and then goes and sits back down. That is the same for everyone, then it is Jhonny's turn. The teacher hands him a honey flavor one. Jhonny chews it for a while, then says,
"Teacher, I don't know what it is.". The teacher tries to give him a hint and says, "it's what your parents call each other when you are asleep". Immediately the boy behind Jhonny screams, "Spit it out Jhonny, it's an asshole!!!"
How is smoking similar to oral sex?
The closer to the butt you get the stronger the flavor! 🤢
Knock, knock. Who's there? Susan. Susan who? Season your chicken, it's too plain!
What do emos and unsalted popcorn have in common?
They're both white and flavorless.
Little Johnny walked into an ice cream shop and asked: "Do you have chocolate filled ice cream?"
The man replies: "We are out of that, sorry, we are almost out of every single flavor, do you want me to get you a vanilla filled one?"
Johnny replies: "Sure."
After that, the man asks for Johnny's phone and goes to back of the store. 5 minutes later, the man comes with an ice cream and Johnny's phone.
Johnny asks: "How much for the ice cream?"
The man replies: "Nothing, it's on the house."
After Johnny ate his delicious ice cream, he searched for his watch history. And then Johnny realized the flavor of the ice cream.
What goes in hard but comes out soft
Gum
I’ve been munching away on these new Tic Tacs recently and honestly, they are really good.
It’s a little strange how they came in a bottle labeled “Ibuprofen” though, and really, I’m starting to feel a little sick. The bottle’s almost empty though, so it’s time to get some more!
In memory of Michael Jackson, Starbucks and various other establishments are introducing the Jackson tea. It's 50 year old water, with a 7 year old tea bag
The cashew called the peanut boring.
The peanut felt very unsalted.
I want an almond-flavored biscuit.
Takis.
In memory of Michael Jackson, various ice cream companies are introducing the Jackson Chocolate ice cream. It is either 50 year old cream mixed in with 10 year old nuts, or 7 year old vanilla ice cream with 50 year old chocolate drizzled on 4 year old tiny nuts.
i will never forget my little brothers last word rip.
his last words: paint dosent taste good
What was Michael Jackson's favorite flavor from Ben and Jerry's? Schweaty balls, or if your Michael Joseph Jackson, tiny balls.
What kind of birthday cake do you get on September 11th?
Three small ones, so you can have a flight of different cake flavors!
What is a rat's favorite dessert?
A chocolate mousse cake
Why did John throw the butter out? Because John wanted to see the butter flavor 😂
