Use jokes
How do you embarrass a female archaeologist?
Give her a used tampon and ask which period it came from.
How's your day going?
Shut up, I didn't ask.
Use code tiko#teamfish
There is only one reason why I find women useful.
That is because they make sandwiches, but that is about it.
I was reading a book one day when I suddenly heard a sound. It was the Grim Reaper. I ignored it and continued reading my book. Suddenly, I realized that I was one of the main characters, which, at the end, dies.
I used to like fireworks, but I'm dead now. Fireworks look like a charm if you don't mind something a little ghostly.
What lies beneath your nose and is being picked on? Your boogers.
Pierre Poilievre has lost the government position he had for 20 years.
Bet he wishes his mom HAD used that coat hanger.
I was in class and we had to choose another term for words we use everyday. For kid, I chose "child"; for dog, I chose "pet"; and for wife, I chose "dishwasher."
Sans: What am I using?
A trom-bone!
What phone do midgets use?
A MICROphone.
Name what guns are used for. {wrong answers only?}
Why do women only use their left arm? Because they don’t have rights.
What's the difference between a used condom and the UCP?
The condom was actually useful at one point.
What did Santa use as a candy cane?
Wait, wait, I said it wrong.
Okay.
What did Santa use to do his garden...never mind.
Long time since I made a joke, huh? I used a Time Machine to make this one.
How do you trap a shape? You use a trapezoid.
My wife said, "Why oh why have you ordered carpet, our house is lovely?"
Thankfully the carpet was put to good use in the end, no more stupid comments coming from a rolled up Emily in the bottom of the ocean!
Yo mama so fat, Trump used her like a wall.
What do they use in communion when they run out of bread?
Doughnuts, because they're holy.
Bro, my friend is always using zodiacs as an excuse.
The other day he said he couldn't hang out with me because of cancer. I told him to fuck off. Then I realized why he was mad after that...
A baby is like another step. You use it just the same as the other steps.
Hey guys, I just wanna say what happened to Kanye; he is one of my favorite rappers, and he’s going through a hard time. I don’t see why people can’t just spread love and kindness like me💕
I think that Kanye was right to say what he said. I completely support him, and I don’t understand why people hate on him for using his 1st amendment, and Yeezy should be sued for it.
Quote of the day: Love bests hate as for hate is the killer of friendships - Collin Kaepernick