Use jokes
What fits neatly into a hole, slides nicely between breasts, and if used wrong could choke someone? A seatbelt.
My grandma used to beat the hell out of me for coming home late. Guess who's late now?
What do the Twin Towers and genders have in common?
There used to be two, but now it's a sore subject.
Why does no one die a virgin? Cause life fucks us all.
Why don’t Asians use phones?
Cuz they wing da wrong number!!!
Memes
I used to have a goldfish which breakdanced on the floor. But only for like twenty seconds.
Depressed people have beautiful smiles. Okay, it's not a joke for normal people, but it's a joke for us.
I'm so skinny, I could use floss as a noose.
Yo mama so fat, she uses a mattress as a diaper.
Your mamma so fat she has to use the equator as her belt.
Do you know you’re supposed to wash your sex toys after you use them?
I guess that’s why Catholics invented baptism.
The US Navy Atlantic Fleet is closing in on the North American shores. Suddenly a blip on the radar appears and the radio starts crackling:
"Hello, please divert to 5° East to avoid collision. Thank you."
The commander starts answering:
"No, you divert 5° West to avoid collision. Over!"
"Sorry, sir, you are the one who should divert to 5° East! Over!"
"Listen to me, you asshole! We are the USS Washington, and we have an entire fleet at our disposal, and be sure we'll use all means necessary to keep ourselves safe!"
After a moment of silence, the radio crackled again:
"In case you still haven't figured out, we can't move BECAUSE THIS IS A LIGHTHOUSE!"
"My grandmother used to tell us a joke. She’d say, "Knock knock." We’d say, "Who’s there?" Then she’d say, "I can’t remember"... and start to cry."
I used to date a girl with a lazy eye. Turns out she was seeing someone else the whole time.
This is the log reference. Use it to post your logs. Logs can be posted by Info Gatherers or Announcers.
/{[(Log date) -Month- -Year- -Day-] -Log Title- } "-Log Information- " End of Log
Thank you, -Connor
Yo forehead so big, an airplane can use that as a runway!
You know I used to call my dogs' balls the Twin Towers, until they came rumbling down.
Did you know that in 2001 there was an Among Us game, except that it was on a plane and had two imposters.
Who's the Roblox YouTuber that always sees Among Us and says "stupid"?
Why can't orphans operate Apple devices?
Because they don't know how to use the home button.