Ups jokes

"Knock, knock." "Who's there?" "Tornado." "Tornado who?" "Tornado going to suck yo house up."

Why can't orphans go to school? They need their parents to sign them up.

Thank you so much for helping me get to 20 followers! I'm so happy, every time I look at my followers going up, it makes me so happy. I can't wait to keep posting other things on here! <3

The cannibal got angry, so he threw up his arms.

Everybody asks, "What's up?" but nobody asks, "What's down?"

People were deciding how to punish a terrible criminal, and one man came up with a great idea.

He sat him in a movie theater with no food at all and made him watch a 12 hour documentary about the country Hungary.

You could say Kobe's career went up in smoke.

Why do orphans become criminals when they grow up? Because they want to be wanted.

HAIKU JOKE:

Helen Keller could Fuck a blind man so hard that she Ends up with his child.

Helen threw up gang signs her whole life and didn't know.

Latias is red.

Latios is blue.

You should always remember to put up your curtains because I Pikachu.

A lady walked into a bar and ordered their special drink. The bartender then gave her a brown glass full of milk. The lady complained about this, but then the bartender said, "Just shut up and swallow!"

What did one butt cheek say to the other butt cheek?... You crack me up.

I lost my job by giving up my seat to someone.

I didn't know you're not supposed to do that if you're a bus driver!

The popular girl told me, "I bet your birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory!"

Two weeks later, she shows up pregnant.

...

I guess her rubber broke too.

Why was the short person a coward? They didn't stand up to challenges.

Why did the cumulonimbus not show up for work?

Because it was on strike.

Me scrolling through jokes that sum up my life, starts crying.

My friend: What’s wrong?

Me: Nothing, it's just so funny. Lol😂🤣😂

I would tell you a joke about a slice of pizza, but it's really... cheesy. I donut think you will come up with a better pun than this.

What burns up a football stadium?

A football match.