Ups jokes
Instead of Obama, it was supposed to be Osama. Pretending I got their names mixed up.
An Asian walked up to another Asian that was crying.
He asked, "Is somting wong?"
The other guy says, "I was i a noh paking zon."
So, I went up to an emo and I said, "Why did you steal my bar code from my chips?"
One thing you can ask Mario:
"Can you jump up and down for me?"
Friends, who's your barber? They mess up big time.
Me.
You're just jealous because my dad cuts my hair for free, and you have to be paying 30 dollars just for that short-ass cut.
Tooth 1: Hey, do you like my jokes?
Tooth 2: Yeah, but they're cracking me up.
I am a good role model, because you look up to me. Deez nuts!
You know shit is going down when anything pumped up kicks related is brought into school.
Why did the stairs move?
Because it was up to something!
"Deznuts up your ass."
Yo mama so stupid that she sat on the TV and watched the couch.
We are in a matrix, wake up.
Jack and Jill went up the hill to get to the house. They turned the lights out. Jill shouts, "It's a dildo, WTF?"
Gwen just wanted to help you with the bullying.
Tip 1. Ignore them; bullies are really just cowards.
Tip 2. Stand up for yourself; it's ok for people to also help you, but you do the same for yourself!
Tip 3. Just let them be; they're just stupid!
Love you-Iariah
To RANDYYYY,
Hi Randy, this is ALYA. I don't want to fight with you. If you're an orphan and you do know about your past, you probably get sad, right? Well, these jokes just bring up the bad times for me.
-ALYA with love
A man walked into a bar with an AK-47 with a 50-round mag and yelled out, "Who the fuck fucked my wife?" Everyone was quiet.
One man at the back stood up and called, "Sorry mate, but I don't think you have enough bullets."
A penis is driving a car when all of a sudden it gets hit by a car, what did the penis end up saying?
Aaaawwwww I got dicklash!
Information has been leaked from government sources. When the current lock-up ends, the holder of the nation's purse, Fishi Rucksack, will launch a new initiative.
This will be to help the struggling "personal services" industry and will be labelled, "Sleep out to Help out."
Shut the f*** up, I am an orphan!
When someone keeps talking while you are trying to focus on something, what is the rudest thing you can say to them?
SHUT UP!!!
What’s up with the foot feet?
What is the plural of "goose"? "Geese."
What is the plural of moose? Well, it ant meese.
Well, it’s my first joke. Please forgive me if it’s bad.