Travel jokes

What's the worst time to fly a plane?

My wife is so fat! I took her to the Grand Canyon. She fell in and got stuck!

"What's the wifi password?"

"121i362"

"It's not working."

"What wifi are you trying to connect to?"

"The United Airline."

"We're in the World Trade Center, though."

"Back To The Future"-Doc: You can time travel to anytime in HISTORY, Marty, but NEVER go to the year 2021.....

What is the difference between cunnilingus and a confused Parisian tourist?

One lapses into French, the other Frenches into laps.

There's a plane crash. Every single person died.

Who lived? The married people!

Why do orphans hate plane rides?

Because there’s no home to come back to.

I sat down and reminisced about the past. I remembered all the people I've lost along the way.

Maybe becoming a tour guide wasn't a good idea.

Jonny went to Disney and they had sour balls. He asked the cashier for some and he pulled down his pants.

Why did the man get on the bus to get sussy?

Anyone go to Success Jonesboro, AR?

787 bowing.

I had fresh coconut the last time I went to Hawaii. It’s a tough nut to crack.

Leaving for Disneyland! See you guys on Tuesday!

Why did the Italian cross the road?

C'era un uliveto.

I got a GTR yesterday, now my kids say, "GTR we there yet?"

The reason your dad never came back with the milk is 'cause he ran 88 mph downhill.

The best way to enjoy Port Arthur is to shoot through--a quote by comedian Isaac Butterfield.

"You think THAT'S bad?!? Remember the time I was in Paris with Donny de Francovich?"

"Nepal is a good place because it has been a great time for me."