Travel jokes
Why can’t you run in a campground?
Because it’s past tents.
Two Timetravers walk into a bar...
...the bartender then said, "Sorry, we don't serve Timetravers here."
Jimmy asks an elevator operator what he thinks of his job.
The operator shrugs and says, "It has its ups and downs!"
How about that airplane food? I eat it when I'm high.
I found the best GoFundMe: https://www.gofundme.com/f/help-get-the-time-machine.
Memes
Me after hearing
Why did the rapper go to space?
To drop some COSMIC RHYMES!
"Rajesh get on bus, so many people, squeeze here squeeze there. He daydream about naughty stuff, like coffee spill but not coffee. Bus move, stop, he press close to pretty lady, she smell nice. Rajesh think how funny if something else spill, make whole bus ride wild." He laugh to self, bus ride never boring now!
To make tea, road, road, road, road.
Case.
The space of space, Der der.
The chosen week was chosen.
Object.
Der mezzer lakes.
What's the most delicious city in the world? Hamburg.
"Buy a man an airplane ticket, he will fly once. Throw a man off an airplane and he will fly for the rest of his life."
- Sun Tzu
My girlfriend is so stupid, she asked me if I wanted to shower with her to save money on our water bill, while we were staying at a hotel where we didn't even have to pay the water bill.
Confucius say: "Gay man who take far, far away trip, hates to leave friends behind."
Why did Jordan cross the road? So he could get to his house.
I traveled through time to get my dad back.
I failed because I was 1e21 years off.
What is the difference between interstate and intercourse?
When your mum went to the UK and wore a yellow jacket, everyone started yelling "Taxi! Taxi!"
When you got on an airplane, the flight attendant asked which hairline you were flying with.
The Emo kid was late to his flight, so he needed to cut to the chase.
Hairline so big people had to time travel to find the end of it.
Last week I went on a whale watch.
After everyone had piled onto a boat, they loaded the boat onto a trailer and drove to your house.