Worst Jokes Ever
I would tell you a joke about unemployed people, but they don’t really work.
I threw a paralyzed kid into the fireplace and called him hotwheels.
If I wanted to kill myself, I would just climb up your ego and jump down to your IQ.
Child: *drinking milk*
Farmer: Hey, what are you doing?
Child: Oh, I just milked one of your cows.
Farmer: We don't have any cows, we only have bulls.
Child: *realizes*
I like my wine how I like my women: 7 years old, and locked up in my basement.
Sex is like math.
Subtract the clothes, add the bed, divide the legs, and pray to God there is no multiplying.
Like this if you are a single Pringle like me.
What’s worse than nailing 10 babies to 1 tree?
Nailing 1 baby to 10 trees.
What's 9/11 survivors' least favorite NFL team?
New York Jets.
Why doesn't Mexico have an Olympic team?
Because everybody that can run, jump, and swim is already in the U.S.
20 likes by just cheese.
Where did Suzy go after getting lost on a minefield?
"Everywhere."
If I went to Walmart, I would be able to scan my own wrists because they're barcodes too.
Why do orphans eat cereal with water? Their dad didn't come back with the milk.
If you push someone that's bullying, if you kill someone that's murder, if there is no evidence it's nothing.
Q: What does LMAO mean?
A: Launching Missiles At Orphanages.
I still remember my grandpa's last words: "Turn the lawn mower off!"
What do Michael Jackson and Santa Claus have in common?
They both leave children's rooms with an empty sack.
What planet did Hitler hate the most?
Jewpiter.
A high school student and his best friend were rushing to class after his best friend caused them both to be late. His best friend asked, "Would you like to hear a joke?" "Sure," he replied. "What do you and your sister have in common?" "I don't know." "Because of me you're both late for your next period."