Worst Jokes Ever
Jack and Jill went up the hill to smoke some marrahwanah.
Jack got high, slapped her thigh, and then they had some fun.
Jill forgot to take her pills, and now they have a son.
What is Hitler's favorite food? A hindenburger.
Papa John's pizzeria and abortion clinic. You make 'em, we bake 'em.
What did the Asian parents say when they had a disabled kid?
Sum ting wong.
Husband: "I think I might take a picture of your breasts and frame it."
Wife: "I think I'll take a picture of your penis and enlarge it."
I would say a good joke, but all the good ones Argon.
A girl and boy are in bed after sex. The boy goes, “I can’t believe they got together after all that shit.” The girl says, “Who?” The boy goes, “My ass cheeks.”
"I bought my little sister a trampoline for her birthday, but all she wants to do is sit in her wheelchair and cry."
What is the most difficult day in the ghetto?
Father's Day.
Hairy vagina is like sweets with the wrapper on. You don't like it, but you still eat it.
A miscarriage always brings the child out in me.
Who works at IHOP? A girl with one leg.
P1: Why did the chicken cross the road?
P2: To get to the other side DUH?!?
P1: No dumbass, it's to get run over because he has depression, a chronic illness, and his father left him for a good for nothing pimp that doesn’t even give a shit about how he feels. (Kinda like me).
P2: Holy shit are u ok? *Some random eavesdropping fucker dials 911 in a hurry*
What’s pink, black and has 17 nipples?
A trash can behind the cancer ward.
What talks high pitched and can't fly?
A gay man in Iran.
I only kidnapped orphans because they have no parents to report them missing.
How did Helen Keller burn the side of her head? She answered the iron.
How'd she burn the other side? They called back.
One day Timmy walks in on his mum in the bath. Then he asks, “What’s that dark fuzzy thing, mummy?” and mum said, “It’s a bush, every girl has one!” Then the next day he walks in on his dad in the shower. So he asks, “Daddy, what’s that long thing?” The dad then says, “It’s a sexy boy” accidentally. Timmy asks his dad, “What does sexy mean?” And the dad says, “Your mother, of course,” making it seem like a child-friendly compliment. Then the next day at school Timmy wanted to compliment his teacher. He walks up to her and says, “You’re so so sexy!”
What do chairs spend on the most?
Chair-ity.
What did the white kid pull out of his bookbag?
A 9mm.
Nutted in my shoes, now my kids are taking a walk.