Worst Jokes Ever
Why is Santa's sack so big? Because he only comes once a year.
Why do Indians have a red dot on their head?
Because they're recording.
Real quick, I'm autistic, and if anyone asks, I absolutely love some of these jokes. XD I found this while doing some research for a paper.
Two people just met. One said, “We should do some bonding.” The other nodded and said back, “Titanic.” The first just looked confused so the second one just said, “Sorry, thought that would be a good icebreaker.”
How do you know when a football player has been to jail?
When he goes in a tight end and comes out a wide receiver.
Patient to doctor: "Will I be ok, Doc?"
Doctor: "I doubt it. Mercury is in Uranus now."
Patient: "I don't do that astrology stuff."
Doctor: "Nor me. My thermometer just broke."
A man crashed his new expensive car into a tree. He now knew how the Mercedes bends.
No means no, but if you use chloroform, it’s a guaranteed yes.
What did the orphan say to the crippled man?
I suffer from crippling depression.
What did one iceberg say to the other iceberg as the Titanic went by?
"I'd smash that."
Why did the transgender girl want to be a boy?
Because momma never raised no pussy.
Note to self.
When baking for the holidays, don't Google "creampies".
Google "cream pie recipes".
I went on a walk with a super pretty girl, then she saw me and it turned into a run.
What do you call children born from incest?
Gross Domestic Product.
Why did Stephen Hawking die?
Because his wife changed the WiFi password.
Why don't North Koreans like jazz music?
Because they don't have soul.
Every zodiac sign has a hairstyle except for Cancer.
What kind of vacuum does an abortion center use? A: Dyson.
Did you hear about the cannibal who passed his brother in the woods?
Why couldn't the astronaut put the helmet on his head?
Because he didn't have enough space.