Worst Jokes Ever
So a girl says, "You're so ugly to me," and she says, "I’m the prettiest girl." I say, "Yeah, a pretty girl for an ogre 👹!"
I think the military shouldn’t allow trans people, because all they'd do is switch sides.
Why were the Twin Towers mad?
They ordered a pepperoni pizza, but only got plane.
You could be sitting alone and still be the dumbest person in the room.
Yo mama so fat, when she skips a meal, the stock market drops.
What’s the difference between a motorcycle and a mutilated body?
I don’t have a motorcycle in my garage.
What do you call a gay guy on the BBQ?
LGBBQ.
What's the emergency number, Jimmy?
Jimmy: 9/11!
On September 11, 2001, I was in geometry class.
On that day, we learned you can remove one side of a pentagon by intersecting it with a plane.
What type of tea do you drink with the Queen of England?
Royal-tea.
So, I was in the bathroom at school washing up, and this girl walked out of the stall and she was like, "Hey, can you make me laugh? I have been having a pretty bad day." And I was like, "Sure." I was like, "Come here." So she came over to me. I was like, "Girl, look at yourself in the mirror." And she started laughing so hard, and she said, "I'm so ugly."
Josh: What’s the useless piece of skin around the vagina called?
Daniel: Isn’t it the women?
Josh: Oh yes, that’s right.
Kid: I have the corona virus!
Nurse: Here is an ice pack.
What's the difference between a pile of dead bodies and a computer?
I don't know, I have both!
What is the difference between an enzyme and a hormone?
You can't hear an enzyme.
If a girl jumps off a cliff, some people call it suicide and some call it girl power, but I call it BULLSHIT.
I feel sad because I went to an old man in a wheelchair while he was sitting next to a fire, and I screamed, "Hot Wheels!" 🤣
What's the difference between you and an orphan?
Nothing.
What does the receptionist at a sperm bank say as clients leave?
Thanks for coming!
Why can't toilet paper cross the road? Because the toilet paper got stuck in a crack. 🤣🤣🤣