Worst Jokes Ever
Why did the Japanese NOT shoot down the American plane that was dropping atomic bombs?
From what their eyes saw, it was a piece of rice.
My wife cheated on me with my brother.
She didn't have a sister, so I improvised, and now all I have to do is wait nine months for one to come.
Why did the hooker quit her job?
She had a nut allergy.
What's the difference between intelligence and apathy?
I don't know! I don't care!
Why don’t witches wear underwear?
To get a better grip on their broom.
What is the worst comedy for disabled people?
Stand-up comedy!
Q: Why do depressed people always have colored hair?
A: That’s as close as they can get to dye.
My friend entered a pun contest. He entered ten, figuring at least one of them would win, but no pun in ten did.
what makes emos jump?
a. bridges
Friend: Stop with the self harm jokes, they're not funny.
Me: It's not that deep. I'll cut it out.
Women treat me like a god.
They ignore me till they need something.
Q: Why was the depressed kid sad on Christmas?
A: They weren't hanging like the ornaments on a tree.
It's not funny to joke about orphans. Without any education, they'd never understand what the jokes mean.
If you want to get mental damage, visit the site:
https://schlechtewitze.com
Any game: "Are you a boy or a girl?"
Non-binary people: *cries*
How many brain cells does a pregnant blonde have?
Two, one for her and one for the baby.
What's an astronaut's favorite candy? A Milky Way!
The woman saw a cute lookin' cop. She had pulled up right next to him and said, "Hey, can I get your number?" He said, "Yeah, it's 911," and drove off.
I realized that a really bad joke and my life are the exact same thing.
I've always been suicidal. Some might say, "Why haven't I actually done the act?" I'll just say, well, I hate myself too much so I thought I'd stay around for the punishment of staying alive.