Worst Jokes Ever
Would you like to try African food?
They would too.
You: Find a time clock that can change time.
Your friend the next day: Hey, can I borrow yo' house?
You: No, I'm trying to figure out what to do with my TIME!
Also you: Changes the time back to 1267 so you don't have to have that friend again.
What do orphans call a selfie?
A family photo.
My dad died in 9/11. He was such a good pilot.
Roses are red, Lemons are sour; Lift your skirt up and give me an hour.
What’s the rarest gun to find in Africa?
A water gun...
At least if you're fat you don't need to put as much bathwater in the bath.
Women need to be in the kitchen.
Why did the booty go to therapy?
It had some DEEP-SEATED issues.
Me and my girlfriend broke up, so I took her wheelchair, and she came crawling back.
Which planet would I consider dating?
I don’t know, but not Saturn because she’s already got a ring on her.
I hate 9/11 jokes... They always crash and burn, like, dude, it's not funny?
Why doesn't Voldemort have a human nose?
Because his snake bit it off!
The towers ordered pepperoni but got plane.
Are you a school? Because I want to shoot kids inside you.
Hey guess what...
What...
My penis is big.
Just watched my friend take a steak out of her pocket. That steak was so outta pocket.
I walk in from work to find my wife dead on the sofa.
As I unzip for one last ride, she says, "BOO!" What kind of sick fuck does that?
Yo mama's so fat that she used a telephone pole as a tampon.
When I was very young...
My classmates played a game called kiss chase. Some were really good at catching the girls and then kissing them.
They are rapists now.