Worst Jokes Ever

NASA stands for "Nobody Already Seen Astronauts."

Are you a plane? Because I wanna be in control of you for a few hours.

POV: You're an orphan.

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

Not your mom.

Yo hairline is built like the Mississippi River.

Roses are red, violets are blue, like my hole, Uncle Bill is making me full, better run here he comes!

What do you call an orphan's parents?

Dead meat.

What do you call Yakub with no eyes?

No eyes Yakub.

Eat my ass!

For orphans, every bag of chips is family sized.

I don't see why people say that emo kids don't like to hang out.

I've seen them hanging all day.

Your mom and your dad.

I took my son to a driver's school and am surprised because he got his license but soon lost the privilege to drive a car because he ran over my ex on "accident."

(I gotta go pay him out of jail!)

I could be red, I could be orange, I could be yellow, I could be green, I could be blue, I could be purple, but I would be dead.

My fitness guru said that if I got raped, it would help me in future marathons.

When you're having a normal day at school, but then...

"All the other kids with the pumped up kicks"

I hope Stephen Hawking was an organ donor, 'cause I need some parts for my go-cart.

Joe mama's so hairy when she went to the movie theater, the people thought she was Chewbacca!

Yo mama is so fat that Naruto couldn’t make enough shadow clones to surround her.

Yo mama is so fat that a whole forest grew on her, but it was sad because she really smells, so the forest died.

How do planets have a baby?

They have spasex.