Worst Jokes Ever
What does the "W" stand for in Africa?
Water.
So... here's da scoop, alright... *licks KFC off lips* so, I was caught having sex wit three 6 year olds (girls btw, just in case you guys get mad) and da judge told me I was getting da death penalty, you know what I mean?
I had a last resort to save myself though, you feel me? So I told da judge, I said to him, I said: "Yo honah, 6 + 6 + 6 = 18, you smell me?"
Needless to say, I was announced a fre-e-e-e-e-e-e man after dat, you feel me?
But then, the Predator Poachers nigckas just barged into the courtroom and they said: 4 + 4 + 5 = 13!
Alas, I'm writing this joke from jail, and judging by the look my prisonmate Tyrone is giving me, I'll be writing jokes from hell from now on.
My aunt’s star sign is Cancer, so it’s pretty ironic how she died. She was eaten alive by a giant freaking crab!
My mom said to let Jesus come inside me; now I can't sit down.
Man, cancer is so easy to beat. I'm already on stage 4.
What do you say to a woman with two black eyes?
Nothing, you ain't already told her twice.
Dark humor is like a kid with cancer. It never gets old.
You look like a burger.
When my dad once went to the Virgin Islands, now it's just called the Islands.
Why did the two balls cross the road?
To get to the penis!
Sorry, too rude?
What goes in dry and comes out wet?
A dick.
A pedo is driving down a highway really slowly and gets stopped by the police. The officer asks why he was driving so slowly. The man answers, "I don't wake up the kids."
She said no, so I raped her.
What did the deaf, dumb, and blind kid get for Christmas?
Answer: cancer.
I'm gay, lol.
What do we want?!
A cure for Tourette's!!
When do we want it?!
Cunt!!!
I ate the last of my Egyptian food, and now I falafel. I don't know why I made that joke. Probably just becuscus.
A German priest went to America for a few months. Unfortunately for him, he did not speak the best English. He stayed with a beautiful, young single woman who worked at a nearby orphanage.
Every day, he visited her in the orphanage, and he always brought her small gifts, and of course to the young children.
The young woman thought the priest was flirting with him, and she knew he was not married. She left that thought in the back of her mind for a few weeks.
A few weeks later, she finally brought up her nerve to ask him. She asked him why he always visited her, and why all the gifts for her and the children.
Of course, due to his bad English, he struggled a bit with his sentence, but he said in his thick German accent, "Vell, I visit you and your, your littles, because the kind girls here are very beautiful and cute."
She was quite amused, and blushed a bit. The man was also a bit nervous, and appeared to want to leave her office.
The Priest then excused himself, and went to read the orphans a bedtime story.
He then muttered to himself, "Ach, she's catching on to me! Stupid! Zey are called little girls and boys, not child boys and girls."
Two WiFi routers got married. The ceremony was OK, but the reception was amazing.
What do you call it when you drop a bottle of food dye?
"It's dye-ing."