Worst Jokes Ever
Did you hear about the guy who invented the first knock knock joke?
He won the No Bell Prize!
I didn't trip and fall... I attacked the floor, and I believe I am winning :3
Why didn’t the girl like stairs?
They were always up to something.
How did Stephen Hawking die? Because he didn't charge his batteries.
What's the difference between Mark Zuckerberg and a lizard?
There is no difference.
What’s the best thing about fucking twenty-eight year olds?
There’s twenty of them!
Is your dad Spider-Man, because he got no way home?
I accidentally handed my wife a glue stick instead of a chapstick. She still isn't talking to me.
Are suicide bombers taught properly how to fly, or...
Are they just given a quick crash course?
One day I was very happy. I managed to win the lottery and receive a free vacation trip to Saudi Arabia!
Everything was going well until suddenly the FRAUD appeared! It was him, PRISTIANO PENALDO! He dived toward me and grabbed my lottery ticket. I asked him why he is doing this, only for him to reply "I need trip to Saudi Arabia to statpad the PENS!" as he dived back through my window.
Shame on you for stealing my vacation and ruining my day! You are no longer my Idol Pristianooooo!
Today I went to the doctor for a test, and he said I have 10 months to live.
So later that day I stabbed him to death, and the judge sentenced me for 15 years in prison. Problem solved!
What's the difference between a priest and McDonald's? They both stick their meat in 10-year-old buns.
#takemebacksophie
You can lead a horse to water, but a pencil must be lead.
What were Stephen Hawking's last words?
"I'm lagging."
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef.
What do you call a cow with two legs?
Lean beef.
Two of the worst jokes ever.
I want a job cleaning mirrors. I could really see myself doing it!
Why did the elephant cross the road? It didn't see the cars.
People are like trees...
If you hit them with an ax multiple times, they'll fall over.
My brother told me he wanted to find a golden apple tree in real life. I told him it was a fruitless mission.