Lock

Lock Jokes

Kid:what is between moms legs? Dad:paridise. Kid whats between you legs? Dad:the key to paridise. Kid:well uou better change the lock the neighbor has the key to.

5

So I got asked why I suddenly started wearing a beret and I said, well you never know when you need to pick a lock

What's worse than locking your keyes in the car in front of an abortion clinic?

Having to go back inside and ask to borrow a hanger.

3

what do you do when you get locked outside your house...... you talk to the lock. because communication is key.

A blonde really got tired of all blonde jokes and decided to hang herself in the bathroom. As she locked the door, she yelled at her husband, "I'm hanging myself because I'm tired of jokes about us blondes being stupid!" Her husband broke into the bathroom and saw his wife with a rope tied on her toe. The husband said, "I thought you were hanging yourself." She said, "Yes, I am!" The husband replied, "Usually when people hang themselves, they tie the rope around their neck, so why is yours tied on your toe?" She said, "I tried that, but I couldn't breathe."

What's a similarity between The Ark of the Covenant, The Holy Grail and a bunch of 12 year olds?

They are all locked in the Priest's basement.

What's the difference between orphans and girlfriends? I don't have 100 girlfriends locked in my basement.

What does a kid and wine have in common?

Shit i forgot but they're both locked in my cellar right now.

0

Who is more loyal: a dog or a wife? Well, lock them both in your trunk for two hours and drive around and see which one is happy to see you.

Knock knock who’s there dooris dooris who dooris locked that’s why I’m knocking