Kid:what is between moms legs? Dad:paridise. Kid whats between you legs? Dad:the key to paridise. Kid:well uou better change the lock the neighbor has the key to.
What's worse than locking your keyes in the car in front of an abortion clinic?
Having to go back inside and ask to borrow a hanger.
So I got asked why I suddenly started wearing a beret and I said, well you never know when you need to pick a lock
what do you do when you get locked outside your house...... you talk to the lock. because communication is key.
What's a similarity between The Ark of the Covenant, The Holy Grail and a bunch of 12 year olds?
They are all locked in the Priest's basement.
What does a kid and wine have in common?
Shit i forgot but they're both locked in my cellar right now.
"Better lock 'em doors and turn the lights down low......... better turn em on just stubbed my fucking toe"
Q:How do you make a door cry A:Twist it’s knob
How did the burglar get into my house?
Intruder window.
I like my orphans how I like my wine, locked in my basement for ten
Some locked me out of my house today.... At least the children in my basement aren't my problem anymore
What do you call a virgin kid locked in a room with a pedophile? Past tense.
Where is the worst place to lock your keys in your car?
The anti abortion clinic because you have to go back in and ask for a coat hanger
Max likes his girls like he likes his wine. 7 years old and locked in his basement.
Before my grandad died he whispered to me is your uncle still in the basement i said he has died oh my grandad said i will lock him in heavens basement
I heard that the numbers on the front of your credit card represent the number of minutes until you meet the 💕 love of your life!💕 and the 3 numbers on the back represent the month and day you make it official!! comment those numbers to lock it in!!😄
My screen lock is my favorite picture of my wife. When I'm on a 14-hour shift, being miserable, hating my life... I pull out my phone and gaze at the picture of my wife. Then I realize it's better here than at home with her ass.
I FOUND A KEY THAT WORKS FOR EVERY DOOR AT MY SCHOOL
-->[] go through the door if you can
did you try the digital egg padlock? because it is very easy to crack the code.
