Worst Jokes Ever
Why do French people like to eat snails so much?
They can't stand fast food.
Why did the zookeeper lose his job? For choking the chicken and spanking the monkey!
What’s the similarity between your uncle and your hands?
They can both do dirty things.
What did the sand say when it got into a fight with the ocean?
"Oh my God, you're such a beach!"
How many times does 42 go into 9?
Get in the van to find out.
What's 10 inches and makes women scream?
Cot death!
Who is the biggest slut in the world? Ms. Pacman, because you give her 25 cents and she swallows balls until she dies.
What is the difference between a school bully and a feminist?
The school bully does not hide behind their computer screen.
There is a kid in my class who is allergic to peanuts. He says he's gay. He can't be though... he's allergic to nuts!
How many dead prostitutes does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
More than three because the basement is still dark!
What turns a girl on more than having sex with her?
When she finds out that you have a vibrator too.
The Annoying Orange called Donald Trump a copycat.
What do you call a bunch of bi-racial, retarded kids? Mixed vegetables.
What's the difference between anal rape and a microwave?
A microwave won't brown your meat.
What's a pedophile's favorite holiday?
Halloween. Free delivery!
Mary's mother was a good person. Why did she die?
Because she got stabbed in the heart 60 times by a switchblade.
Break a wine glass: I give you bad luck for a year.
Break a mirror: Funny wine glass, I give you bad luck for 7 years.
Breaking a condom: Haha so funny mirror.
What do you call a steak that tastes bad?
A MISsteak.
RIP Stephen Hawking who was buried today... he did always love black holes.
Did you hear about the new German microwave? It has ten seats in it.