Worst Jokes Ever
What's black and white and hard as nails? A nun on speed!
What does a carpenter do after a one night stand?
The second nightstand.
What's worse than sucking a dozen raw oysters out of your grandmother's cunt?
Putting in 12 and sucking out 13.
How do you know if someone is anorexic? You toss them a onion ring and see if they eat it, or use it as a hula hoop.
A pun enters the room and kills ten people.
Pun in, ten dead.
What's fast and almost got away?
A Mexican jumping the border.
what is the difference between a basement full of dead prostitutes and a bowling ball in the basement?
I don't bowl.
I was hunting at night for deer, and then I found one and shot it. I realized the deer I shot was actually my ex...
I was on a bus when this girl offered to blow me for $5.
...and never being a person to pass up a good deal, I gave her $5 and watched her do her thing. After she was finished she lit up a cigarette and started smoking right there on the bus.
I was disgusted. I thought to myself, "What is this world coming to? Who sells cigarettes to a 12 year old?"
How is smoking similar to oral sex?
The closer to the butt you get the stronger the flavor! 🤢
I respect anyone who devotes their life to charity work.
But I think Paul Walker went a step too far.
I am only familiar with 25 letters of the alphabet.
I don't know why.
Why did Paul Walker cross the road?
He wasn’t wearing a seat belt.
Q: Where did Sally go when the bomb went off?
A: Everywhere.
Imagine the Russians showing up late to the 1917 revolution with a Tsarbucks in hand. They were late, so I guess they weren't Russian. They were probably Stalin.
An American is touring the Soviet Union. A Russian takes him to a school so he can see what it's like. He asks the kids if they like the Soviet Union. All of the kids say yes, they love it. All but one. That kid bursts out crying. The American asks what's wrong, and he cries, "I want to live in the Soviet Union!"
Guess how I got away from my mom saying I can't play Fortnite? I took my stuff and I ran to Iran.
I like my coffee the way I like jokes about my coffee, I don't.
What do you call a heterosexual man giving a brojob to another heterosexual man?
gay now, heterosexual later.
What happens when Batman sees Catwoman?
The Dark Knight Rises.