Worst Jokes Ever
I told my friend that someone accused him of blowing dead bears. I said I defended him by responding that I saw 1 get up and walk away.
When you go to your friend's house to fuck her brother, but realize he's your brother from your mom's side.
What do you get when you mix alcohol and literature? -- Tequila Mockingbird.
What did the turtle do when he ran out of gas?
He went to the Shell station.
Two silk worms got in a fight. It ended in a tie.
Michael Jackson goes to the doctor.
Michael Jackson: "Help, doctor, I've been shot!" Doctor: "I can't fix that, but I can change your skin color so it doesn't happen again."
What do trans men and Pinocchio have in common?
Both are lying when they say "I'm a real boy."
(I'm a trans man myself lol)
What do you call a fish with no eye?
A ffsshh.
Chuck Norris didn't join the army, the army joined Chuck Norris.
How do you sink an American battleship?
Have the French build it.
I like my woman like I like my coffee: in a big sack on top of a donkey.
What do you call a belt made of watches? A waste of time.
Why is six afraid of seven?
Because seven is a registered sex offender.
Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?
Because he didn't have the guts to do it.
I once had a cat that reminded me of Doug Ford.
Fat, mean, and probably inbred.
Why can't dinosaurs clap? 'Cause they're dead.
What do you call a horse rider with Down syndrome?
Down Quijote.
There are 10 types of people in this world.
Those that know binary and those that don't.
My mom said the happier a person is when sick, the sooner they get better.
So I went to the hospital, hooked up everyone's breathing masks to laughing gas.
What's the difference between Jesus and a picture of Jesus?
It only takes one nail to hang up the picture.