Worst Jokes Ever
I’ve got money and suicidal thoughts, and I’m all out of money.
It was just a prank, and stop calling our humor "plane." In our opinion, it's fire.
I hope Stephen Hawking's an organ donor because I need new parts for my go-cart.
The other day, I walked up to someone who looked lost and he had all scraggy clothes on. I said, "Are you an orphan?"
He said, "Yeah, what gave me away?"
I said, "Your parents, buddy."
My cousin said being gay was such a pain in the ass and I asked him why and I said, "Cuz you get buttfucked?" and he said, "No, I get made fun of." and I said, "Why? Cuz you get buttfucked?" and he said, "No, turd." Then I said, "Wow, at least I'm not the one with real pains in my ass, bro."
How do you make a blind person jealous? You ask if it's a nice day out.
When is a right time to dance on a body? If it is under the floorboards.
I say hi to Sans. Sans shows his hand and says, "It's hand to meet you," and we both laugh.
A scarecrow said this job isn't for everyone.
But hay! It's in my jeans!
How much work does a skeleton get done?
A SKELE-TON!
Getting hurt is a bone-breaking experience. It's such a spine-tingling event!
(demons in my head) I laugh to meet them...
Q: Why did the pervert cross the road?
A: Couldn't get his dick out of the chicken.
What did the momma grape say to the pappa grape?
"Raisin' our kids is usually pretty fun, but sometimes they get sunburn and I have to take them to the doctor for dry skin."
Yo mama so tall, she was next to Neil Armstrong on the moon.
Roses are red, fishers are fishing,
I really hope you’ll be reported missing.
Person A: What do you call the dangly bit of an octopus?
Person B: Tentacles?
Person A: Ok *tickles person B ten times*
What do you call an act of “funny” discipline? A PUN-ishment!
Why did the ocean break up with the pond?
Because the pond was too shallow.
I had a good time with friends!