*Loud explosion inside the tank*
"Where's the commander?" "He's gone." "Where has he gone?" "All over the place."
Which branch of the military accepts toddlers? The infantry.
How did the Germans conquer Poland so fast? They marched in backwards and the Polish people thought they were leaving.
What is your arms favorite military branch? The army.
I once had an emo friend doing a course for the marines. He made the cut.
Why does the United States have such a good military? Because they learn to dodge bullets in school.
Q: What do you call 6 gay men in the army
A: Rainbow six seege
What do you call an army of disabled people? Special forces
What do you get when you drop a piano on an army base?
A flat major
What do you call an autistic kid with a gun? Special forces
Jim: My grandpa fought in the army during world war two. He was an officer. Me: Cool, what rank of officer? Jim: SS. Me: ...
Two atom soldiers are fighting against an army. One gets shot. He cried out, im hit! I think I've lost an electron! Are you sure? Asks the other. Im positive!
This one as actually physics(unlike some other joke here, ahem cough cough)
Did you know my grandpa was in WW2, he killed Hitler
Why did the Drill Sergeant get in trouble? He got caught playing with his Privates!
Jim and Allyn are 2 mates in the Air Force. They were paired up for a training exersice. They got up into the air and Jim said, "okay Allyn, your helmet can control the missile when launched from the jet. Go ahead and test fire a missile and aim it at anything you want." Allyn fired the missile and had his eyes set on an abandoned building. Jim then said, "I also forgot, watch out for friendly fire." Allyn said "what?" As he looked over at Jim.
What do you call a Russian rifle that went 1 rank down?
An AK-46.
Chuck Norris didn't join the army, the army joined Chuck Norris
why was the roman soldier kicked out of the army- because he was romin around during war
Officer: "Stay back soldiers, minefield!" Soldier: "Let's clear the field!" Officer: "Ok!" *silence*
*explosion*
Why did hitler lose the war ?
Because göring ate every last airplanes , tanks , artilleries , ships and ammunitions
