Worst Jokes Ever
Why do vegans like to make their food look and taste like meat?
Same reason lesbians use strap-ons. They still like putting meat in their hole, but they don’t like where real meat comes from.
Why are there no Walmarts in Palestine?
There are Targets everywhere.
What website should you go to to look up LSD dealers?
TripAdvisor.com
How did Protestants perform in the 16th century? Well done.
Chuck Norris' dick is so big that it has its own dick. And his dick's dick is still bigger than Bruce Lee.
I asked my Dad the other day, "At what age is it okay to have sex with girls?"
He replied, "When they leave school, son, they are legal."
Apparently, 3:15 p.m. is not what he meant.
Why is there no gambling in Africa?
Too many Cheetahs.
Why did the Canadian cross the road?
To say sorry to the other side.
Knock knock. Who's there? Ya. Ya who? Sorry, I prefer Google.
How many programmers does it take to change a light bulb?
None, that's a hardware problem.
What nationality is Santa Claus?
North Polish.
I love the way the Earth rotates.
It really makes my day!
They toss and turn to the sound of thunder, but I got watermelon to soothe my slumber!
Hey girl, are you a drill sergeant, because you have my privates' attention.
My roommate's diary says I have boundary issues.
What do vegetarian zombies eat?
Graaaaiins.
If Silver Surfer and Iron Man teamed up, they would be great ALLOYS!
Knock knock! Who's there? Deja. Deja who? Knock knock!
Why is April the smartest month?
It can never be fooled.
My father is like Houdini. When he heard his girlfriend was pregnant, he disappeared.