Worst Jokes Ever
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Looking in the mirror, I don’t need a therapist, god damn, I wanna be a terrorist.
Have you heard about the movie "Constipation"?
No, because it never came out...
What did the blonde say when I told a rape joke?
"Can you show me what rape is?"
The couple next door made a porn film.
They don’t know it yet.
Can I put my balls in your jaws?
Singing in the shower is fun, until you get soap in your mouth.
Then it's a soap opera.
Why did an orphan have s**? To have someone to call daddy.
What was Stephen Hawking's last meal?
Meals on wheels.
What do you call it when an Arab girl has an abortion?
Removing a bomb.
What's the difference between a porn star and a mosquito?
One stops sucking when you smack it.
What are Russia's favorite netball positions?
Goal Shooter and Wing Attack.
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Ligma.
Ligma who?
Ligma balls!
What color is your Bugatti?
Police Report: Looking for a female, light brown hair, blue eyes, freckles, and a small scar on her right check.
Last seen on CCTV wearing see-through bottoms, a pink top, and a vibrating dildo hanging out of her arse. If you find this woman, please get her to charge the dildo for excessive fun.
Yo mama so slow, she took nine months to make the joke. Thank god mine only took 6.
If it does more than pee, it's too old for me!
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't find home.
My name is Dan, I wear white Vans, I have a gun, get in the van!
Girlfriend: You remind me of a cellphone.
Ex-Boyfriend: How and why?
Girlfriend: Because you're about to die!