How do you say "Brazier" in German?
Stop 'em from floppin' (German accent)
Worst Jokes Ever
What did the orphan ask Santa for? A good family.
When I see lovers' names carved on a tree, I don't think it's sweet. I just think it's surprising how many people bring a knife on a date.
What’s a depressed kid's favorite game? Hangman.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't make it to home.
One day, I was sitting on my couch watching YouTube when I heard a knock on the door. I opened the door, and to my surprise, it was my dad. I haven't seen him in 16 years, so I let him in. I noticed he had a gallon of milk in his hand, and he went to the kitchen and put the milk in the fridge.
Then he walked towards me and said, "Oh no! I forgot the cereal!" Then he walked out the door and drove away. I never saw him again.
Mother, father, and a son. Father purchased a robot that can detect lies. The robot slaps when you lie.
During dinner time: Father: Son, what have you done today? Son: I watched Netflix, Dad. Robot: Stood up and slapped the son! Son: Okay! Okay! I watched porn, Dad. Dad: What? You watched porn? You are only 14! I never knew porn till I was 18 years of age. Robot: Stood up and slapped the Dad! Mother: started to laugh and said, "Sure he is your son!" Robot: Stood up and slapped the mother!
If a homeschooled kid kills his parents, is it considered a school shooting?
Where do suicide bombers go after death?
Everywhere.
What do old people and meth heads have in common? They usually trip over their balls.
cock, cock, and cum
I still remember the last thing my grandfather said before kicking the bucket: "Hey, wanna see how far I can kick this bucket?"
Your mom is so fat that she can't get internet because she is worldwide.
Why did orphans want to commit a crime?
Because they wanted to see what it feels like to be wanted.
No one cares if you bully an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
Why did the orphan get an iPhone X for his birthday?
Because it has no home button.
Please welcome Mozart's The Magic Flute...
In A minor.
Why does an orphan wanna be a criminal?
Because they wanna be wanted.
I would tell you an orphan joke, ehh I’ll just tell your parents instead.
A man receives a phone call from his doctor.
The doctor says, "I have some good news and some bad news."
The man says, "OK, give me the good news first."
The doctor says, "The good news is, you have 24 hours to live."
The man replies, "Oh no! If that's the good news, then what's the bad news?"
The doctor says, "The bad news is, I forgot to call you yesterday."
