Worst Jokes Ever
What's the Pixar movie close to being a pornstar? Toy Story... *I got a friend in me*
What do orphans call their parents?
Unicorns because they don’t exist.
I am an actual police officer (Not gonna mention with which department in case they actually check this site) and tbh I find these jokes funny as fuck, carry on boys.
Keep the planet clean. It's not Uranus.
What's the difference between an orphan and an apple tree?
Apples get picked.
My favorite joke: My life.
My teacher asked everyone how tall their grandparents were. I responded, "My grandpa is 5ft 10, and my grandma is -6ft."
What's the difference between a hooker and a drug dealer?
A hooker can wash her crack, then sell it again.
What’s the difference between a zit and a catholic priest?
A zit waits till you’re 13 to come on your face
I arrived at work and saw a kid crying. I walked up to the kid and asked, "Hey, where are your parents?" and the kid just cried more. God, I love working at an orphanage.
I lost my virginity to a girl with Down syndrome. I told my mom I wanted my first time to be special.
I piss on blind kids and tell them it's raining.
Why did the basketball player not get on the bus?
Because he couldn’t be caught travelling! 😂
Yesterday I wanted to look up the term "procrastination".
I swear, I'll do it tomorrow.
Kid: Mom! You lied to me!
Mom: When?
Kid: You told me that my little brother was an Angel!
Mom: Sooo?
Kid: Then why didn’t he fly when I threw him off the balcony?
Mom: WHAT!!!??!!
Why did the orphan become a criminal? It wants to be wanted.
Why'd the orphan cross the road? He was told his parents were on the other side.
Do you know how a dragon is? You don't know who? It's dragging these 2-liter balls across your pathetic face and slamming it into a f*cking dumpster you regret.
Today I saw a little boy wearing rags sitting on a curb. I said, "Awww, are you an orphan?" He said, "Yes, what gave me away?" I said, "Your parents."
Roses are red, violets are blue.
Shrek is ugly, but not uglier than you.