Worst Jokes Ever

Hi Jake!

Hi Manuel.

Guys, I know this is kinda weird, but everyone who wants to... Put your name and your age in the comment section. Not address though because that would not be good for creepers... Lol I am Lucy and I am 15 years old. What about you guys? :D

Me: *opens a bag of hot Cheetos in class*

All my friends: Hey bro, can I have some?

People I don't know: Please lemme have some. PLEASE, I'll be your best friend!

People I say no to: (⊙-⊙)(⊙-⊙)(⊙-⊙)(⊙-⊙)(⊙-⊙)(⊙-⊙)

Where did your dad go? Because I saw him at the milk shop. Oh wait, there isn't one.

— Can I borrow a book [on] how to kill myself?

— Librarian: No, because you won’t bring it back.

What do you call a flying pig?

Fiction.

A blind man walks into a bar...

And then a chair.

And then a table.

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

Banana.

Banana who?

Orange.

Orange who?

Orange you glad I didn't say banana again?

What would you name a detective if he didn't already have a name?

Cassie.

Get it?

Your forehead is so long, even Einstein didn’t know how to cross it.

What did the window say to the door?

"What are you squeaking about? I'm the one with the panes!"

Get it?

What did the dog say when he got its tail caught in the door?

"It won't be long now..."

What did the undershirt say to the T-shirt when they were fighting?

"If you don't shut up right now, you're gonna lose your shirt!!!"

Get it?

I love orphans. They're precious.

He do American feel like Trump is the president, he is stupid like soup.

What do you cross with a cow and a tiger? (mooigter)

When you're angry, punch an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?

Why doesn’t the sun go to college?

Answer: Because it has a million degrees! 😀

Kid: Dad, where do you work?

Dad: I.C.U.P.

Kid: HAHAHAH!!!! See you pee.