Permission jokes

Why can't orphans go on school field trips?

Parent Signature: _______

Why can't orphans go on school trips?

"Parents signature _________"

Father: "The church is on fire! GET OUT! GET OUT!"

Priest: "Ok, what about the children?"

Father: "FUCK THE CHILDREN!"

Priest: "Do you think we'll have time?"

What's the only time you can do almost whatever you want?

When you have a gun in your hand.

Why can orphans not go on field trips? They need a parent signature.

Why can’t orphans go on school field trips?

Parent Signature: ______

"I know that everyone is allowed to act stupid once in a while, but you’re really abusing that privilege."

A poster for the winter relief fund reads: "No one should be allowed to go hungry or suffer from the cold." A worker says to his friend, "Now were not even allowed to do that."

I was going to make a rape joke, but I don’t think you would’ve given me consent.

What's the difference between a refrigerator and a gay guy? You have to ask permission before stuffing it with meat.

Why can't orphans go to sleepovers?

Their parents never say yes.

Why can't an orphan go to a field trip?

Parent's signature: ___________

Why do orphans hate school?

No field trips. Parent signature_____________.

Mom, can I please go out and play?

... no answer.

Why do orphans get to watch rated R movies? Because their parents can't stop them.

Yo, sis, come here.

Sis: What?

Me: Oh, sorry, you doing school?

Sis: Yup.

Me: Can I go?

Sis: No way, you're going to hug me.

Me: I love you.

I remember when I was at a funeral at the age of 6. I was with my grandma and asked, "Grandma, Grandma, why is that man in a box?"

And she says, "He's in a better place now." I look at her confused and ask, "What kind of box did he live in before?! How is this box better than the last one?! It's just a box!"

And to this day I am still not allowed to go to funerals.

Why do orphans make the best girlfriends?

Because they don't need permission from their parents.

Why couldn't the orphan go on a school trip?

A parent's signature was required.

"I only want to play with your daughter. It was okay yesterday."