Worst Jokes Ever

Roses are red, violets are blue. I see you, I see you; you would have to work out.

What's the opposite of Jason?

Jasister.

Lenard is a joke.

You're so black, when you get near the sun, we go into a solar eclipse.

I should just flush this joke away.

I was walking in a park today and a little girl I asked, "Where are your parents?" She said, "Gone. My dad went to go get the milk and never came back," and I said, "Oof."

What did a bee who was interested in philosophy say?

"To bee or not to bee."

What did Jay Z say when he got pulled over?

"I got 99 problems but a bitch ain't one!"

What do you call Aston?

Asston.

I will remember my auntie's last words: "If you shoot me, your p-nis is small!"

(gun shot)

Your mama's so fat, when she asked for a water bed, they put a blanket over the Pacific Ocean.

Always breathing down my neck, my vampire girlfriend does not give me any space.

Ganesha is an elephant.

I was about to joke about your life, but I think your life is already a joke.

My friend bought a Tom Holland blanket and I said, "Well, now you're sleeping with him."

What do you call a person with no arms and legs?

You can call him whatever you want; he's not coming.

Why do orphans suck at baseball? Because they never could play catch.

What does a cloud wear in a storm?

Thunderwear.

You're adopted, do you want to know why? Because you're so ugly.

My mom told me to recycle the trash. I guess I’m taking you for another bike ride!