Worst Jokes Ever
What do you call an autistic kid with a gun?
Special Forces.
I was at a funeral for some kids in a school shooting. I don’t understand why everyone was so sad, so I asked a lady, "what’s so sad?" and she said, "What do you think was running through these kid’s head before they died?" I replied, "probably a bullet." She gasped and said, "do you have any idea how insensitive that is? What do you think is running through their parent’s heads?" I said "probably all the money they're losing from this funeral."
What did a terrorist say when New York didn't want his food?
"Here Comes The Airplane!"
Why did the orphan sleep outside? ... Because he gets to wake up to Mother Nature.
What's the difference between apples and orphans?
An apple gets picked.
When 9/11 happened, we changed our airport policies. When school shootings happen, we haven't changed anything since the shooting at Columbine in 1999. And we say we want the children to be safe.
What's the best thing about an abortion joke??
No one gets offended.
Where do otters come from? Otter space.
Why do people think Jesus is going to come back? He wasn’t nailed to a fucking boomerang!
Yo mama is so fat and old, when Jesus said "Let there be Light!" he told your mama to move out of the way!
Yo mama is so fat Thanos snapped twice.
What does a slave owner use to buy slaves? A Master Card.
I hate this. Everybody knows it's how I roll, if you jump into my van you get a Tootsie Roll. My uncle said this...
Why are orphans bad at baseball?
They don't know where home is.
A favorite childhood memory was building sandcastles with my grandfather, that is until my mom took the urn away from me.
I’d make fun of transgender women, but that’s low hanging fruit.
Why do orphans always have water in their cereal? Because the dad never came back with the milk.
Guess why orphans can't be gay? Cause they have no one to call Daddy.
BIDEN!
Kid. What is an orphan's favorite breakfast?
Teacher. What?
Kid. Fruity pebbles with water.
Teacher. Why water?
Kid. Cause his dad never came back with the milk.