Worst Jokes Ever

What's the similarities between the New York Jets and the World Trade Center?

They both fall in September.

Teacher on school bus, "Everybody sit down now, the bus is about to start."

Ben: "I’m not going to sit down. I don’t want to."

Teacher: "You have to, or else you have to get off the bus."

Teacher: "*stands up*"

Ben: "Then you should get off the bus 'cause you're not sitting."

Teacher: Jeff, why did you throw a paper plane at the twins?

Jeff: You wouldn't get it, miss.

Jake: Can I go outside?

Mom: Did you clean your room?

Jake: No.

Mom: Then f*ck no.

Jake: Alright, bet.

(Brother named No)

"Hitler and Goring are standing atop the Berlin radio tower. Hitler says he wants to do something to put a smile on Berliners' faces.

So Goring says: 'Why don't you jump?'"

The last thing the victims were thinking was, "Is there 9 or 11 stories?"

Math Teacher: "If I have 5 bottles in one hand and 6 in the other hand, what do I have?"

Student: "A drinking problem."

I was going to give him a nasty look, but he already had one.

When people say they get ho's: You don't get no ho's, the only ho's you get is in yo draws.

College is the opposite of kidnapping. They demand $100,000 from you, or they'll send your kid back.

*America shoots down balloon*

China: "You killed an innocent man!!"

USA: "What?!"

China: "Yes, he was a famous sumo wrestler."

Why can't an orphan be a criminal? Because they are not wanted.

Pussies and tits have one thing in common: they're both made for kids, but men end up licking or suckling them.

Twitter just blew my mind.

I was having a blast until I ended the stream with a bang!

What’s the difference between Apple and an orphan?

Apples get picked.

What's an orphan's favorite movie?

"Home Alone."

Your mama is so fat that when she ate a burger, she liked it.

You're so poor that homeless people feel sorry for you.

Q: What did the Buffalo say to his son when he left for college?

A: Bison.

How many times was Bin Laden shot?

911 times.