666 + 420 + 911 + 21 = ?
Do it in calculator.
My pencil sharpener broke, so now my pencil is pointless.
What do you call a can opener that doesn’t work?
A can’t opener!
Yo mama is so stupid, she thought a jigsaw meant dancing with a saw!
A retarded kid sees a murderer chopping up his latest victim with a saw. The retarded kid yells, "Seesaw!" because he sees a saw.
Why do they call matches, matches?
They all look the same.
What do cutting boards and a suicidal teen's wrist have in common?
They both have cutting marks.
I'd call BlessedBrian a tool, but at least a tool serves a purpose.
Why did the hip-hop artist always carry a pencil?
For those FREESTYLE DRAFTS!
What did the rapper say to his BROKEN PENCIL?
"You broke the beat!"
What is an emo kid's favorite Tool? A rope.
What do you call a sharpened pencil? You call a sharpened pencil a sharpened pencil.
What's the difference between a pregnant girl and a light bulb?
... You can unscrew a light bulb, but you can't unscrew a pregnant girl.
What happened when a hammer punished the nail?
He hit him.
You're like a vacuum cleaner. Why? Because you suck.
You should wear binoculars when calculating. It helps divide.
What do robots 🤖 shave with?
Laser blades!
The circular saw asked the chainsaw, "When am I as big as you?"
The chainsaw would answer with, "When you cut down some things in your life. Like your owner."
The circular saw would reply with, "What?"
This joke is like a vacuum cleaner... it sucks.
Butcher knives are great tools for cutting many things!
Fruit, vegetables, my arms.
