Screwdriver jokes
What’s an emo kid's favorite wood working tool? A chop saw!
Are you a builder, because you give me an erection.
“Which tool,” Andrea Bocelli asks Chris Doemges, “fits best in the mailbox?”
Doemges: “Probably the flathead screwdriver!”
A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel attached to his dick.
The bartender asks him why.
And the pirate says:
"Argh, It's driving me nuts."
To become a licensed airline pilot requires 1,500 hours (two years) of training. But it only takes 10 seconds to steal the pilot’s jacket and hat.
What do you do when your dishwasher stops working? You slap her on the ass and tell her to get back to work.
The experienced carpenter really nailed it, but the new guy screwed everything up.
What did the guy exclaim after inventing the shovel?
It is ground breaking!