How do you stop a baby from crawling around in a circle on the floor?

You nail its other hand to the floor.

The experienced carpenter really nailed it, but the new guy screwed everything up.

Crucifixion - only one guy who nailed it… at least Jesus didn’t get screwed over, but I bet he was pretty cross about being forced to hang around.

How do you stop a baby from crawling around in circles?

You nail its other hand to the ground.

What’s the difference between the real Jesus and a picture of him ?

It only takes one nail to hang up the picture.

I didn’t like having long nails, but they’re growing on me

Whats worse than ten dead babies nailed to one tree?

One dead baby nailed to ten trees.

What did the 1.8 nanosecond old baby get for his birthday?

Nailed to a puppy falling on a buzz saw being crushed in a hydraulic press while being set on fire.

How do you get a baby to stop crawling in circles? You nail its other hand to the floor.

Jesus walks in to a motel throws 3 nails on the counter and says can you put me up for a night

You know the drill, but do you know the hammer? Hah, nailed that one. But I also think I screwed it up.

What’s black and white and hard as nails? A nun on speed!

What’s the difference between Jesus and a picture of Jesus?

It only takes one nail to hang up the picture.

What’s better than 10 dead babies nailed to a tree?

One dead baby nailed to ten!

What’s more fun than nailing a baby to the floor Ripping it off with a kick

I nailed my Jewish girlfriend so hard she turned Christian.

Hot shingles in your neighbourhood wanting to get nailed.

Whats worse than 10 babies nailed to one tree?

One baby nailed to 10 trees

What did sally get for Easter… Nail polish,

What’s the difference between Jesus and a hooker?

The look on their face when your nailing them

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