Drill Jokes

what type of file does it take to turn a 4 mm hole to a 44 mm hole:

A pedophile

Let’s play carpenter. First we’ll get hammered, then I’ll nail you

You know the drill, but do you know the hammer? Hah, nailed that one. But I also think I screwed it up.

Hey girl are you a drill sergeant, because you have my privates attention

I live next to a kindergarten and yesterday they had a fire drill. It was kinda weird because normally it's me who has a drill around little children.

How did the pornstar cut herself while using a drill? She was to used to grabbing the tip.

What's the difference between a drill and a priest? Nothing they both like screwing stuff!

What’s an emo kids favorite wood working tool? A chop saw!

Why did the Drill Sergeant get in trouble? He got caught playing with his Privates!

"I'd rather go through the pain of childbirth again than let you drill in my mouth,"the woman told her dentist. He replied, "Well, please make up your mind so I can adjust my chair."

I've been going to the dentist for a while now, I know the drill.

I was out ice fishing, and had no nibbles all morning. About noon, this old guy comes out, drills a hole near mine, and starts catching fish as fast as he can bait the hook. I was getting frustrated without any luck, so I went over to ask him his secret. He said "Ymd ggt tm kppp tth yaems womg." I said "Excuse,me, I didn't get that?" so he mumbles even louder, "Ymd ggt tm kppp tth yaems womg!" I shook my head and said "I'm sorry, but I still didn't understand what you said." Frustrated, the man spits out a wad out of his mouth and says "YOU HAVE TO KEEP THE WORMS WARM!"