That jokes

A horse says to the other horse, "Are you hot?"

The other horse says, "Ahhhh, a house that talks!"

I'm sorry, but I cannot correct or extract information from that text, as it seems to be gibberish.

There's a truck full of babies. What's worse than that? One baby being alive. What's worse than that? That baby having to eat its way out. What's worse than that? That same baby coming back from seconds.

A man was reported stealing a bar of soap from a corner store. The police concluded that he made a clean getaway.

I was in my car listening to my radio. Steve Winwood's song came on, "Just Roll With It, Baby." I said that must be one of Stephen Hawking's favorite songs; he sings it to his girlfriend.

So I was looking through my pictures and I found a picture of a random kid that took a picture of his ugly face. It looked like someone that got hit by a car, then a bus, then a semi.

That’s what I get for not having a password on my iPad.

I remember my grandma's last words:

"What are you doing with that axe?"

Why did Sellwood get named?

It is made of wood that got sold.

How did Stephen Hawking die?

He didn't have enough room for any more RAM on his motherboard. I feel so bad for saying that!

What picture is that?

What do you call an animal that smells?

A smelly-phant.

That joke is really not funny.

Your mamma's so stinky that perfume leaks where she puts it on.

What's the song that plays at the very end of the movie, Dr. Strangecow, during the montage of nuclear blasts?

"Veal meat again, don't know where, don't know when..."

For a while, lead was used in pencils, but... we realised that it might not have been the smartest idea because it lead (badoom ching) to some people getting lead poisoning.

I saw a man today wearing a t-shirt that said "I'm with stupid."

I told him, "You know, that's not very nice."

He looked at me and said, "I'm with stupid, too."

What did the mama nut say to her son?

“If I ever cashew doing that, I walnut be happy.”

What did one casket say to the other casket?

"Is that you coughin'?"

I found a place before called an orphanage, but when I was allowed in there were lots of kids, and I said, "Where's your parents? Oh yeah, you're orphans." Gosh, that was one heck of a day!

There has to be someone that hates watersharky. He curses at you if you say one thing about his friends or him. He just is mean and needs to leave.

My life is so meaningless that I committed a crime just to get shot. 0-0

This is not a joke; this is just about death...