That jokes

A friend of mine told me something that I cannot forget, and I am now traumatized to hell. The next day a kid was set for an amber alert that looked exactly like my DEAR friend! :)

Best thing ever right here.

So, there is this app on your phone called ringer. Go into it. There is a 12-15 digit number. Enter that into my phone, my dick will get 12-15 inches longer.

Haven't had sex since I got out of jail; although sex in jail wasn't that great, either.

Eminem: "He don't even know his own father." Orphans: Dang, wish I could listen to that. Eminem: At least you have a rap God to call father.

Every 911 joke isn't that good.

Well, at least not until they come crashing down.

When you have an ex, you will notice that the word "ex" is short for "executed," so that's there for yous.

I read the Brothers Grimm books, then I see a black figure reaping about.

I realized someone has died, but I don't do anything about it. I continue to read, and that's when I realized that I was one of the characters, in which at the end, dies.

Stephen Hawking was a spac. But if you put an E on the end, you get space, and he loved that.

People say towers can't move. Apparently, nobody told that to the Trade Centers.

Your hairline is so bad that it turned Wonder Woman into Failure Man.

Mom: Hey you! What are you doing?!

Me: Nothing, why?

Mom: You're supposed to do your ______.

Me that/every night: *sob*

Friends: Are you okay?

Me: Yeah, fine.

Me in head: Or maybe I'm not okay...

Hi, my name is Unknown Guy! Please join my group for the picture I show you, we will do this every week!

Thanks, leave a comment or sign in using the sign in sheet that I have in Google Forms or own the website.

Hint: Pictures of woman.

Btw, for men only!

Gwen, are you mad at me? Cause that was a faker.

Like the faker Gwen?

And just look up anything that is hot! And don't forget to comment!

There's at least 856 pages of these newest puns. I couldn't finish, because it took me an hour just to get that far. Just saying, that's a lot of jokes!

Yo mama is so fat that every step she takes in the ocean creates a tsunami!

Dear Kenya, I am very sorry for how rude I was to you. I just want you to know that I'm on your side and I'll never do it again. - Sincerely, Gwen

Prince, don't listen to that Princess. She is a fake, I swear. I am the real Gwen.

You're fat. Don't sugar coat it because you would probably eat that, too.

One random YouTube comment in 2018: "Soon, a virus will come to Earth."

A year later: "Pahahahahah that comment is fake lmaoooo ahahahha!"

Another year later: "Time to die a painful death."

Another year later: "God has come with the cure!"