That jokes
Yo mama is so ugly that even Donald Trump couldn't be inside her dreams.
"Hey, is that a peach?"
*gets slapped on the butt*
"Noted."
Your mama was so fat that she sunk the Titanic!
Badminton: Your breath is so bad that you have to take a mint before you go on Fortnite.
There are 10 million million million million million million million million particles in da universe that we can observe.
Yo mama took the ugly ones and put them into one nerd.
Memes
đź’ˇ idea. Start a confidential organization that only recruits via invite. Stockpile heavy duty weapons in an si when the time comes we can defend America from any domestic threat. *just a silly idea*
Your hairline is so far back that the United States got a front row seat!
What's an orphan's favorite toy?
A boomerang because it's the only thing that comes back to it.
Me: You know your parents were very good people.
Orphan: Wow, I didn’t know that.
Me: I know, you're an orphan.
My wife saw me hit the best drive yesterday with my golf clubs.
I must have drove that chihuahua 300 yards.
Did you hear about the cannibal that passed his brother in the woods?
poop i eat it for dinner i eat it at night yet it never comes out of me? how is that possibul?
pOOp
Yo mama so vegetarian that she loves the Vegan Teacher!
What does a waiter in a Chinese restaurant call a customer that won't leave a tip? A "plick."
My dad said not to touch this thingy called a gun, but I looked down that pole and pressed that thing, and now I'm in heaven.
What do you call a guy in a wheelchair that walks into a fire?
Hot Wheels.
Some people could say that the sky was falling that day,
one second they saw the sun and the next they saw heaven.
Your forehead is so big that NASA went to discover Mars, but then they said, "Oops, wrong planet. Mars is smaller than this, we will discover it later."
I was listening to some Drake in class.
My teacher shouted to turn it off. She then exclaimed that "Drake is mid and his music is very Pessi!" I didn’t understand the meaning until I checked the dictionary and realised it is a synonym for overrated.
Your hairline is so long that sometimes even the president doesn't know where it ends.
You're so skinny that your mom had to use a whole shampoo bottle on your head, but she still couldn’t find you.