That jokes
What do you call a bird with no wings?
Moas didn't even know that existed!
My friend said that his book was getting boring and that he's gonna kill off some characters.
I asked him what his book was about and he said, "Oh, it's an autobiography."
What are two things that an orphan can’t have?
Two parents.
What do you call a Punjabi that’s drowning? Mandeep.
I named my dog Stone so that I can say to people that I throw stones every day.
Spare.
You got a spare, spare me an inch of that far juicy cock.
A wife and husband go to a barn. The husband picks up a goat and says, “Look at this pig I have to sleep with every night.”
The wife says, “Honey, that’s a goat.”
The husband replies with, “I was talking to the goat.”
Why is a brick always hard? Because he seen the brick that was getting laid right next to him.
I have to say that Halloween is my favorite day...
Every time they see me, kids and mothers run away...
I don’t have a costume so please don’t reprimand...
When I open up the door, I’ve got my penis in my hand.
Me explaining to the school nurse that ice can't cure everything.
Nurse: hOW DaRe yOu OpPosE mE mORtAl!
I was wearing a George Floyd t-shirt, and a person said to me: "That must be a bit tight round the neck."
There was a fire at my high school when I was in Year 7.
When the local newspaper interviewed my teacher, they asked her how she was seeing the "bright side" of it.
She said, "Well, at least our new students got a warm welcome!"
54 students died that day.
Teacher: Tell me about the history of Tsar Nicholas (blah blah blah).
Student: How should I know, that's his story?
Well, I didn’t get as high as I wanted to, but I’m high enough that if I fall I’d probably break something.
Yo mama is so fat that she is not wrong when she says the world revolves around her.
Yo momma's so short that she fell off the toilet and broke her leg.
Using Pi, distract that fat kid next to you and copy his answers.
A new feature that we are bringing to the Olympics is 3D viewing. So if you're watching the javelin, I would look away now.
And Sterling has taken a dive.
That's all for financial news, back to the football.
Me: Yo wanna play 9/11?
My Friend: What’s that?
Me: It’s a game where I kick you in both legs and watch you fall.