So, today is my birthday. Today, I am 13, but yesterday I am going to turn 10. But I am not even going to school to know the number ten, because one time at 10 p.m. in the morning it was so cold in my hot room, so I went outside to drive my car. But I stopped because the light turned green. I was taking a bath in the front of my car, and it didn’t have a bin, so I am taking a sh$t.
The water in the shower evaporates before it reaches you.
Why is the sun so mean? Because it keeps ROASTING everyone!
It's so cold, I mist bring my jacket.
What does a cute deaf girl and a fire have in common?
They're both hot, but they're both quiet.
What did the police say to the ice cream freezer?
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Cold.
Cold who?
"It is cold out here!"
Be careful around fire, plastic melts.
Why doesn’t the sun go to college?
Answer: Because it has a million degrees! 😀
I think if the center of the earth froze, it would be pretty hard core.
Why is it that skinny men love fat women?
Because we need warmth in the winter and shade in the summer.
I hate when people leave their cars running, especially in the summer.
I'm like, "You got Tracy Latimer in there or something?"
Q: Why do Skeletons hate the cold?
A: It sends chills up their spine.
How many degreeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeees does Billy Corgan have?
1979.
I left a chunk of ice outside during summer. That was the first time I heard icescream.
I lost my job at a research facility. The people were too chill for me.
How do rappers stay warm in the winter?
They drop some HOT BARS!
The only thing colder than Siberia is my girlfriend's ex!
When is a cold not a cold?
Texas be like, "We vote to freeze ourselves!"
