Temperature jokes
One time a kid came to the hospital and said, "I really need help." The kid said he was really hot, so they put an ice cold towel on him.
Then the doctor asked him if he had any problems, and he said, "Yes, I am really hot." The doctor realized that he looked fine, so he said, "Are you sure? You look amazing." And the kid said that he meant to say, "I look hot!"
What is the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman?
Snowballs.
What’s a rapper's favorite type of weather?
When it's Coolio!
How do rappers stay cool?
They have MAD ICE!
Animals are just... so hot!
Why was the rapper always cold?
Because his lyrics were too ICY!
"Fuck" and "sex" are hot, which is fire.
What is your summer name? Hot.
Why did Texas freeze to death? Because they're retarded.
How cool is NASA?
Not cool at all.
Why did the glacier send the iceberg to college?
Because, in order for ice to exist, it must retain a temperature of less than... ZERO DEGREES at the atomic level!
I'm running out of degrees? I guess I better throw myself in fire to raise my internal temperature (measured in degrees).
When they spilled coffee on his neck, he got hot under the collar.
Yo mama so hot, she can fit in a mug.
What did the marshmallow say when he was roasting in the fire? "Is it hot in here, or is it just me?"
It's a very smart day today. I'd say it has about 30-45 degrees, with humidex.
How does a rapper greet someone on a cold day?
"Yo, is the temperature Ice Cube, or Vanilla Ice?"
Why did the snowman melt?? It had a melt down! 😭😭
Why did the Ice Cube complain about being so warm? Because he was dropped on the floor.
What do you call an old snowman?
Answer: Water.