Temperature jokes
Why did the weatherman’s cheeks turn pink?
He saw the climate change.
What do you call an Eskimo stripper?
A frosty-tute.
Animals are just... so hot!
My hotel tried to charge me ten dollars extra for air conditioning. That wasn’t cool.
If your house is cold, just stand in the corner. It's always 90 degrees there.
How do rappers stay cool?
They have MAD ICE!
How do butts stay cool in the summer?
They stay in crack conditioning.
What’s a rapper's favorite type of weather?
When it's Coolio!
Why is it that skinny men love fat women?
Because we need warmth in the winter and shade in the summer.
How are corpses like pools?
Once you get in, it's only cold for like a minute.
How do rappers stay warm in the winter?
They drop some HOT BARS!
How do rappers stay warm in the winter?
With their FIRE LYRICS!
Why was the rapper always cold?
Because his lyrics were too ICY!
How does a rapper greet someone on a cold day?
"Yo, is the temperature Ice Cube, or Vanilla Ice?"
What is faster, hot or cold?
Hot, because you can catch a cold.
Which is faster, hot or cold?
Hot, because you can catch cold.
What do you call a Chinese man in the summer heat? Boi Ling.
I hate when people leave their cars running, especially in the summer.
I'm like, "You got Tracy Latimer in there or something?"
The only thing colder than Siberia is my girlfriend's ex!
The little camel asks his mother: "Mum, why do we have these big humps?"
"Because in these humps there is some water, and in the hot desert we can drink."
"And Mum, why do we have this large fur?"
"Because the desert at night is so cold, and then we don’t feel cold."
"And Mum, why do we got these big hoofs?"
"Because the desert sand is hot, and the hoofs save us from the hot sand."
"But Mum, what the fuck are we doing here in the national zoo?"