Television Jokes

I just watched a documentary about beavers. It was the best dam show I've ever seen.

🍷 📺 What does the Bartles and Jaymes wine cooler television ad have in common with ministers who are ✝️ white christian nationalist? They both thank you for your financial support 👍 👍 👌 👌 😘 😘 😊 😊 💰 💰 💸 💸

Q. whats an orphans fav south park ep A. the anti family guy episode

Why can't orphans watch "The Simpsons"?

Because they don't know who's Homer.

Kid: " Mom I had a scary dream can I come sleep with you and dad " Mom: " sure sweetie sleep in the middle " Kid: " Dad can you get the remote out of my back " Dad: " That isn't the remote "

*Weird background music*

What is the difference in between a orphan and a TV?

One has more channels

Why is Kanye West's haircut actually years of work by many doctors to piece together skull fragments like a jigsaw puzzle? Because Kanye once interrupted Chuck Norris on the set of "Walker Texas Ranger"

Ever seen the show Naked and Afraid? That’s what I call hide-and-seek with my uncle.

How do you stop your newspaper from flying away in the wind? -- Use a news anchor.

A sign that broadcast television has less impact on the masses: The force-feeding of Kelly Clarkson on network television has yet to impact the large stacks of Kelly Clarkson CDs collecting dust in Goodwill, right next to those James Last LPs.

What did Homer Simpson say when he ran over a deer? DOE!

My young son saw trump on TV he asked "Why is the man on TV painted orange?" I replied "Son when Russia pays that much for equipment, They don't want it to rust"

Mom asks “Why are you are THIS show??? It’s DISTRACTING you from SCHOOL!!!!!” The child says “Don’t you mean SCHOOL is distracting ME from this AWESOME show?” Mon whispers “Oh, you DEAD.”