Television jokes

What was the orphan's favorite TV show?

Full House.

I’m probably the episode 9 since I make people cry.

What is a shark’s favorite TV show? Sea-S-I.

What show do orphans never watch?

"Fuller House."

What's a Ninja's worst fear?

Garmadon actually winning.

What was Stephen Hawking's favorite TV show?

Robot Wars.

What do you call a funny family of chairs? A sitcom!

One time I was watching TV.

Mom: Omg, your dad is coming!

Me: Omg, really?

Mom: Sike, I lied.

What do orphans and TVs have in common?

At least one of them has a home.

Chuck Norris once pissed in the tank of a semi as a joke.

It is now known as Optimus Prime.

Little Johnny was watching TV when he heard the TV say "bitch" and "bastard." He went over to his dad and said, "What is a bitch and bastard?" His dad looked at him surprised and said, "A bitch is a female, a bastard is a mailman." Johnny went back to the TV and heard them say "ass" and "shit," so he goes back to his dad and asks, "What shit and ass mean?" His dad says, "A shit is shaving cream like what I'm putting on my face, and ass is a coat, why don't you bug your mom?" Johnny goes back to the TV and hears them say "fuck," so Johnny goes over to his mom and says to her, "What does fuck mean, mom?" She looks over at him and says, "Fuck means carving, like what I'm doing to this turkey!" A few minutes later, Johnny hears a knock on the door. He walks over and answers it. He then says, "Welcome bitch and bastard, may I take your ass?" The people, looking horrified, then ask where his parents are. Johnny responds with, "My dad is putting shit on his face and my mom is fucking the turkey!"

Your mama is so ugly, she walked by a TV and missed eight episodes.

The Stigg is a joke.

What’s an orphan’s favorite Netflix show?

Fuller House.

Tonight, on Top Gear!

James May dives a bus full of kids off a mountain!

Richard Hammond starts WW3 in Germany!

And I fly a plane into the World Trade Center!

Your forehead is so big I could use it to get free TV.

My family was watching Home Alone 2, so whenever Kevin was at the top of the Twin Towers, I threw a paper airplane at the T.V.

What was JFK's favorite school TV show?

BrainPop.

Gen Z is most likely going to be the last generation who felt the pain of getting up early to catch their favorite show.

What did the pickle say to his friend Rick?

"We are Pickle Ricks!"